Emily Vidal
Aunt Selma wouldnâ??t have liked everyone standing around talking about how wonderful she was; sorry Selma, youâ??re gonna have to put up with it. What kept her most young was the fact that she refused to live in the past; she lived in the present and never stopped learning about lifeâ?¦.mar john, computers, new ways to beat people at scrabble, keeping up with politics and in so many other ways. I know she loved her husband Alâ??s family, (he was Uncle Al to me,) every bit as much as she loved her own family. And I also know that she loved all the friends that she had met both here at St. Andrews and those she had throughout her life and that they meant a great deal to her. She used to tell me that â??having true friends is one of the most important things in life.â? Speaking of Uncle Al, I think everyone who knew them when they were a couple felt that they had the most extraordinary marriage. Relationships like the one they had are one in a million. As everyone who knew her well is aware, she was not a religious person and I donâ??t know if she believed that she would see Al again in the afterlife; but Iâ??d like to think that they are finally together again in some way or form that we mere mortals canâ??t understand. If any couple could do it; they could; because they had the strongest connection as a couple that I have ever seen. A lot of people think that our generation is: â??generation me.â? If thatâ??s true, Aunt Selma had her own generation; â??generation you.â? She always wanted to know what was happening in your life, what your interests were, who your friends were, how do you feel about your job, your life, How are you? While some elderly people retreat into their own worlds, Aunt Selma did just the opposite. She never dwelled on the negative, right up to the end. I remember her telling me that one of the doctors she saw in the hospital basically told her that this was the end for her. And she told me â??he doesnâ??t know me; Iâ??m a fighter.â? And she sure was. Right now, I feel very lost without her. But because of all that sheâ??s taught me, I know I can be strong. Because she was the strongest person Iâ??ve ever known. In my mindâ??s eye, I see my grandmother, my father (Selmaâ??s brother,) their sister Elise (my aunt Leesie), and now Selma completing the picture as they are all brought back together again in some type of form or dimension that none of us can understand. My father was a scientist who, like Aunt Selma, referred to himself as â??not religious.â? I remember before my father died, he found me crying just after I had learned that he was very ill. I told him I couldnâ??t stand the thought of never seeing him again in a better place. And he looked at me for a long while and finally said: â?donâ??t you think that if there really is such a place, your old man will be able to find a way in?â? Aunt Selma may not have liked for me to talk about this now, because I donâ??t think she really believed in the afterlife. But what I think she would have done is laughed in that cute, still somehow girlish giggle of hers and said â??if it makes you feel good, then you go right ahead and say it. You say what feels right to you and makes you feel good.â? Again, with Aunt Selma, always about you and not her.Well we all love you Aunt Selma; youâ??ll never know how much weâ??ll miss you. And we all feel your presence, and know you are at peace.